A famous father's poem to his son

Famous Chinese actor 陈建斌 wrote a really beautiful poem to his young son. It's called: Too much happiness. I've translated it so it may not be exactly like the original but nonetheless it's still really heart warming. 陈建斌 said this poem is for his son to read when he is older and it will teach him how to live life 'happily.'

Too much happiness

If you ask me to sing, I will sing.
If you ask me to dance, I will dance.
If you want to watch a movie, I will take you to Hollywood.

If you run, I will follow.
If you stop, I will rest.
If you want to fly, I will wait for you to land.

Don't worry about what other people think, you will find someone who understands you,
Don't worry about life's difficulties, it can only get better.

To find ourselves, there is nothing we should be afraid of.
To find happiness, there is nothing that should stop us.

If you want to jump, I will ask you how high.
If you want to spin, I will ask you how many times.

You are young, you are naive,
You came into this world so long after me,
Yet I traveled the entire world just to find you.

Where did you come from?
Where are you going?
Why have you entered my heart?

Your tears and smiles melt my heart
So that it becomes a real heart.

Just laugh

My little brother is one of the happiest people I know. I miss him a lot when he is not around me. I remember when I used to get mad at him, he would say to me. 'Krystina, just laugh.'

Laughter is the best medicine. Finding the simple happiness in frivolous things. Like dancing in the rain. Or hugging a friend. Or singing in the shower.

I did something today that I never knew I could do. I took my brother's words and applied them. After surviving on two hours of sleep and copious cups of coffee, I was dizzy and tired. I sat at my desk staring at the giant white folders not knowing where to begin. I needed to clear my mind of any distractions whether it be exhaustion or hunger or frustration. So, I did something extraordinary...

I said: "Krystina, just laugh."

So I smiled and took out the first folder. A simple change of attitude can shape the course of your day. I had never felt freer, or more jovial.

I also remember something else my brother said to me. A few years ago, I came home crying because I failed one of my maths papers. My brother was really little at the time, he said to me: "You looked so much prettier smiling."

Children are extremely honest.  They can distinguish between real beauty and the images that society tries to implant into our minds infested with makeup and plastic surgery and breast enhancing techniques. Real beauty comes from real happiness. Real happiness comes knowing that life is wonderful. And that thought will turn into a smile. That smile will lead to laughter.

So you should just laugh.

Next time someone breaks your heart, laugh. Tell yourself it's okay because laughing through the rain means you know that there is a rainbow waiting at the other end.

Next time you don't win the race, laugh. Tell yourself that laughing through defeat means you are ready to run again.

Next time you doubt yourself, laugh. Tell yourself that laughing at your imperfections shows that you are accepting that you are only human.

Next time when someone tells you that you are not good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, laugh. Tell yourself that you are laughing because these people do not know you. They do not know that trying to push you down will only make you stronger.

Next time you feel overwhelmed, stressed, hurt, angry or sad. LAUGH. Laughter will not erase all the pain but it will remind you that you are still alive. Life will always open its arms out to you waiting for you to embrace it.

So just laugh.

Go where the joy is

This is the shortest piece of advice I have ever given but

'Go where the joy is.'



My love forever and always,

Krystina

From my heart to every girl: cheap items attract the most customers

It feels so good to have my two best friends back. They always manage to cheer me up and knock some sense into me when I'm out of my mind. I know in a few years time when we all graduate, I will miss these shared moments walking around in the scorching sun, talking about anything we feel like, cooking, grocery shopping and generally acting like idiots.

So we were discussing our plans for the next 10 or so years when it dawned upon me that I will be 30. I know I've been carrying the burdens of an adult for a while already but I don't do half the things that typical 20 something year olds do. My best friends and I don't stay out all night clubbing, we don't drink alcohol (mainly because I think it is a waste of money), we would rather go to the fruit market than the bar at night and spend time with our girlfriends than mingle with members of the opposite sex.

In other words, we are *dum dum dum*... BORING...

That depressed me. On my way home on Friday nights I often encounter girls wearing skimpy outfits heading the opposite direction to me. While I'm waiting for my bus so I can go home, exercise, shower and sleep, I bet these girls are getting it on with the men of the night. Maybe the 17 year old Krystina would have cared and put on her 7 inch heels, but I have since grown up. That is because I know, as my two best friends always tell me:

Cheap items attract the most customers.

My friend has recently taken the initiative to remind me that I am a diamond. Diamonds are rare, so rare that they cost a fortune to buy. Every girl wants to own a diamond but not every girl can afford one. Cubic ziraconias on the other hand are cheap so they are often used as substitutes. Great girls are like diamonds. They are hard to obtain but they they will never break or lose their shine. These girls will not be with every male who glance their way because they are waiting for the men who can actually afford them. The ones who are not willing to pay the price will go for the cheap cubic ziraconias. They appear more sparkly, probably wear well at first but their quality in the long run will deteriorate.

My friend told me the story about how one of her friends and her boyfriend fell in love. The girl in the story was very beautiful, family orientated, never partied and kept to her close friends. Her boyfriend was extremely extroverted, tall, handsome and attracts plenty of female attention. He fell in love with the girl in the story because he knew she was different. She had her set of values and cared about the people she chose to care about. She never tried to fit in or use her beauty to gain the attention of other men. He knew if he wanted a one night stand, he could easily find a girl at a club. But if he wanted someone who would love him and bring value into his life, he would need to work hard to win the girl over. And he did, eventually. These days, they enjoy cooking at home and cherishing each others' company. When a man knows his woman's worth, he would never throw her away. You wouldn't want to lose a diamond.

I'm telling you ladies, pretty much all single straight men want to sleep with you, if they get given the opportunity, they probably will. You need to remember that if somebody doesn't work hard for your affection, they will never know your value. You cannot sell yourself short of anything less than the price of a diamond. I know it makes me sound like an outright fussy bitch but you will thank me one day for telling you this. If your aim is a one night stand, be my guest and close this page. If you want a relationship that is meaningful where your man knows how much you mean to him, you must first eliminate all the men who are not willing to put themselves out there for you. You do this by rejecting any forms of physical intimate contact until they factor you as an important part of their lives and have earned your trust. If they are a good guy, they will still stick around to understand the real you. Reliability, honesty, integrity and respect all come into play at this point. At first, you may feel like you will never find someone who can meet up to your standards, but eventually, the right man will come along and pay for the diamond because he is convinced it will be worth it.  

Don't ever settle for anything less.





My love forever and always,

Krystina

Be a woman of class

 

The feeling of unwarranted loneliness during the past few weeks had taken a toll on my mentality. I wanted to be understood and cared for. I was sick of making decisions, of domestic routine, of waking up to the sound of my alarm clock. I wanted to go home and cuddle with my little brother, have long meaningful discussions with my Dad and fall asleep in my Mum's arms. It was hard especially during Chinese New Year because I knew for the first time in many years, I would be alone on a day I would normally spend with my loved ones.

I didn't recognize myself anymore. I had changed from someone innately independent to a needy little girl. I realized at this time, I was the only person who could make things better.

I want to tell you something that might not cure your loneliness but it will benefit you in so many ways. I wasn't able to think clearly at first but I can now.

Here it is;

Be a woman of class. 

What I mean by class is someone who will never undermine herself no matter how she is feeling. This woman is confident in her decisions and can see the big picture instead of letting small mishaps or periods of loneliness affect her values and goals. She has a life she can be proud of because she knows her own capabilities and she doesn't need anyone to justify how fantastic she is. She can be there for the ones that she cares about because she doesn't crave reassurance from them, she enjoys their company. She doesn't compare herself to anyone else and she doesn't expect everyone to love her. She has that thing I talked about in one of my first posts called the inbuilt happiness. As a woman, you also need inbuilt class. No matter what other people say, what mistakes you have made in the past, you can move on without hatred or contempt. Class is about treating yourself right, treating others with respect and carrying yourself with integrity.

I was not a woman of class during my needy period. Actually I was far far away from where she stands. But I am wide awake now. There is always that point in time where you snap back into place. Before that, no matter what people say to make you feel better, it doesn't have any impact. I love the wake-up period because your mind is completely refreshed. But as you reflect on the past few weeks, you really cringe at the person you were.

All I can say is...

I'm back baby! 

I even treated myself to the Peace Love and Juicy Couture perfume so I smell amazing. Versace and DKNY scents are still my favorite but every now and again when I need a little help to retain my class, I will spray my Juicy Couture.

After a grueling two weeks of utter nonsense, I'm stronger than I ever was. I'm also a little sleepy. I will talk to you guys later.





My love forever and always.

Krystina

Promise yourself

 A friend of mine posted this beautiful piece of advice by Christian D. Larson on Facebook. I now have it pinned on my wall. I hope it makes as much sense to you as it does to me.



“Promise Yourself
To be so strong that nothing
can disturb your peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness, and prosperity
to every person you meet.

To make all your friends feel
that there is something in them.
To look at the sunny side of everything
and make your optimism come true.

To think only the best, to work only for the best,
and to expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others
as you are about your own.

To forget the mistakes of the past
and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful countenance at all times
and give every living creature you meet a smile.

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself
that you have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear,
and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world,
not in loud words but great deeds.
To live in faith that the whole world is on your side
so long as you are true to the best that is in you.”

― Christian D. Larson

Choose happiness.

Bob Dylan candidly spoke about his wife: "The one thing about her that I always loved was that she was never one of those people who thinks that someone else is the answer to their happiness. Me or anybody else. She’s always had her own built-in happiness."

I am going to explain to you a very simple concept, yet, many have failed to come to terms with its existence. It's a little something called 'Happiness.'

Everyday we are experiencing emotional turbulence, arduous tasks and people we can't stand. Petty sentiments such as jealousy, disgust and negativity dissuade us from what should be the focal point of our lives; the pure joy of being alive.

Everyone experiences some sort of turmoil in their lives. Nothing is ever made to be perfect or to last forever. That is why we need to have what Bob Dylan calls a 'built in happiness' to experience lasting contentment.

Real happiness begins from loving yourself. When you know who you are and what you stand for.  Happiness resonates a quiet and inconspicuous confidence, often the product of age, experience and achievement.

There is a really horrible scene in Jerry McGuire where the boy says to the girl; 'you complete me.' This is the part that sends shudders down my spine. A lot of young people believe they need to be in a relationship in order to be happy. This is just an example of where we are going wrong. We believe happiness takes the form of a certain special someone or something. That is not the case. You have to make peace with what you have and accept your limitations. Here is the part that applies to this paragraph; a relationship should be the cherry on top of the cake. Without it, the cake can still stand tall and mighty. You are still deliciously desirable and COMPLETE on your own.

I'm currently reflecting on what makes me happy. God, family, friends, a good book, Sex and the City, playing the piano, Spring sunshine, Summer at the beach, singing in the shower, going for a run before sunrise, yoga, writing for hours upon hours...

These are the most fulfilling yet underrated things I can think of. Note: I didn't include traveling around the world or winning the lottery. I want to prove a point, in order to cherish the big things, you need to enjoy the small things first. Sudden doses of happiness don't last very long. You need attainable and consistent pleasures that you can reach out for whenever you require a happiness reminder. I am always excited at the prospect of traveling to another city or country but this only takes place once or twice a year. If I invest my happiness solely in special occasions, I will let the beauty of simple joys slip away .

'The prettiest dresses are worn to be taken off.'-Jean Cocteau.

We cannot depend on material items to build up our happiness. Don't get me wrong, I always squeal when I see Ralph Lauren or Tommy Hilfiger on sale but I know fashion is always changing. What was yesterday's treasure can well be today's trash. The only thing consistent is what you can control. In this case it is your level of happiness.

Look around you, you have someone who cares deeply for you, a home, a future and (I'm assuming) internet access. If only you can smell the sweet spring scent, hear the birds chirp, walk three miles, hug someone you love then you should be happy. I know it's not that simple. We have bills to pay, people to please, jobs to complete and the impending fear of what the future holds. Life can never be perfect. Happiness is a conscious choice. The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything but they know what they have is enough to keep them happy.

That my friend is genuine happiness. It is that simple.




My love forever and always,

Krystina