A famous father's poem to his son

Famous Chinese actor 陈建斌 wrote a really beautiful poem to his young son. It's called: Too much happiness. I've translated it so it may not be exactly like the original but nonetheless it's still really heart warming. 陈建斌 said this poem is for his son to read when he is older and it will teach him how to live life 'happily.'

Too much happiness

If you ask me to sing, I will sing.
If you ask me to dance, I will dance.
If you want to watch a movie, I will take you to Hollywood.

If you run, I will follow.
If you stop, I will rest.
If you want to fly, I will wait for you to land.

Don't worry about what other people think, you will find someone who understands you,
Don't worry about life's difficulties, it can only get better.

To find ourselves, there is nothing we should be afraid of.
To find happiness, there is nothing that should stop us.

If you want to jump, I will ask you how high.
If you want to spin, I will ask you how many times.

You are young, you are naive,
You came into this world so long after me,
Yet I traveled the entire world just to find you.

Where did you come from?
Where are you going?
Why have you entered my heart?

Your tears and smiles melt my heart
So that it becomes a real heart.

Just laugh

My little brother is one of the happiest people I know. I miss him a lot when he is not around me. I remember when I used to get mad at him, he would say to me. 'Krystina, just laugh.'

Laughter is the best medicine. Finding the simple happiness in frivolous things. Like dancing in the rain. Or hugging a friend. Or singing in the shower.

I did something today that I never knew I could do. I took my brother's words and applied them. After surviving on two hours of sleep and copious cups of coffee, I was dizzy and tired. I sat at my desk staring at the giant white folders not knowing where to begin. I needed to clear my mind of any distractions whether it be exhaustion or hunger or frustration. So, I did something extraordinary...

I said: "Krystina, just laugh."

So I smiled and took out the first folder. A simple change of attitude can shape the course of your day. I had never felt freer, or more jovial.

I also remember something else my brother said to me. A few years ago, I came home crying because I failed one of my maths papers. My brother was really little at the time, he said to me: "You looked so much prettier smiling."

Children are extremely honest.  They can distinguish between real beauty and the images that society tries to implant into our minds infested with makeup and plastic surgery and breast enhancing techniques. Real beauty comes from real happiness. Real happiness comes knowing that life is wonderful. And that thought will turn into a smile. That smile will lead to laughter.

So you should just laugh.

Next time someone breaks your heart, laugh. Tell yourself it's okay because laughing through the rain means you know that there is a rainbow waiting at the other end.

Next time you don't win the race, laugh. Tell yourself that laughing through defeat means you are ready to run again.

Next time you doubt yourself, laugh. Tell yourself that laughing at your imperfections shows that you are accepting that you are only human.

Next time when someone tells you that you are not good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, laugh. Tell yourself that you are laughing because these people do not know you. They do not know that trying to push you down will only make you stronger.

Next time you feel overwhelmed, stressed, hurt, angry or sad. LAUGH. Laughter will not erase all the pain but it will remind you that you are still alive. Life will always open its arms out to you waiting for you to embrace it.

So just laugh.

Starbucks and feeling homesick

I miss Starbucks. They don't have Starbucks where I live now. I remember back in high school, getting coffee was such a grown up thing to do. I only ever liked Starbucks coffee. I loved the Christmas editions. They were really yummy. And the green tea mocha. That always made me happy.

I'm feeling severely homesick. It's probably just the weather. Normally, during Winter breaks I would be headed somewhere with my family. This year, I'm stuck here. Alone. I guess. Not entirely alone. I have friends here. I have a job to do.

I just wish I can go back to the days where I would walk 20 minutes to my best friend's house in Newmarket and we would go and eat ice cream from the Korean market or have late dinner somewhere in the city. Most stores were open till a decent hour.

Being 16 doesn't feel like that long ago. Why do I feel so lonely tonight? Why am I craving for a coffee shop that I haven't set foot in for 7 months?

It's not the Starbucks I'm missing. I want to go home. I want to go back to high school. I don't like being 20. All this responsibility and stuff that is supposed to happen in the near future. Like maybe finding someone I want to be with. I'm in my 20's. I should be thinking about these things. Grown up things. I'm not a kid anymore. I hate that.

There is no age that I am currently looking forward to turning. I anticipated turning 18 because that meant I could legally drink alcohol. I soon discovered that alcohol was bad for me. So I gave that up.

I've experienced the parties, the alcohol, the guys, the girls, the butterflies, the rainbows, the hurt, the pain.

I've discovered that I don't like growing older. I don't like responsibility. I don't like waking up at 6am every morning. I don't like the idea of finally settling my thoughts.

I've also discovered something else. I don't like growing up but it's going to happen. I don't like responsibility but I like being independent. Waking up at 6am in the morning means a new day has arrived. And Starbucks isn't the only place that makes a decent cup of coffee.

So I've gone around in a circle. I tell you what I don't like and then I tell you that I can deal with it. I'm still feeling extremely homesick but I have pretty good company here too. And I'll figure out all this jazz about growing up as I go along.

I'll talk to you soon.


Krystina

Go where the joy is

This is the shortest piece of advice I have ever given but

'Go where the joy is.'



My love forever and always,

Krystina

From my heart to every girl: cheap items attract the most customers

It feels so good to have my two best friends back. They always manage to cheer me up and knock some sense into me when I'm out of my mind. I know in a few years time when we all graduate, I will miss these shared moments walking around in the scorching sun, talking about anything we feel like, cooking, grocery shopping and generally acting like idiots.

So we were discussing our plans for the next 10 or so years when it dawned upon me that I will be 30. I know I've been carrying the burdens of an adult for a while already but I don't do half the things that typical 20 something year olds do. My best friends and I don't stay out all night clubbing, we don't drink alcohol (mainly because I think it is a waste of money), we would rather go to the fruit market than the bar at night and spend time with our girlfriends than mingle with members of the opposite sex.

In other words, we are *dum dum dum*... BORING...

That depressed me. On my way home on Friday nights I often encounter girls wearing skimpy outfits heading the opposite direction to me. While I'm waiting for my bus so I can go home, exercise, shower and sleep, I bet these girls are getting it on with the men of the night. Maybe the 17 year old Krystina would have cared and put on her 7 inch heels, but I have since grown up. That is because I know, as my two best friends always tell me:

Cheap items attract the most customers.

My friend has recently taken the initiative to remind me that I am a diamond. Diamonds are rare, so rare that they cost a fortune to buy. Every girl wants to own a diamond but not every girl can afford one. Cubic ziraconias on the other hand are cheap so they are often used as substitutes. Great girls are like diamonds. They are hard to obtain but they they will never break or lose their shine. These girls will not be with every male who glance their way because they are waiting for the men who can actually afford them. The ones who are not willing to pay the price will go for the cheap cubic ziraconias. They appear more sparkly, probably wear well at first but their quality in the long run will deteriorate.

My friend told me the story about how one of her friends and her boyfriend fell in love. The girl in the story was very beautiful, family orientated, never partied and kept to her close friends. Her boyfriend was extremely extroverted, tall, handsome and attracts plenty of female attention. He fell in love with the girl in the story because he knew she was different. She had her set of values and cared about the people she chose to care about. She never tried to fit in or use her beauty to gain the attention of other men. He knew if he wanted a one night stand, he could easily find a girl at a club. But if he wanted someone who would love him and bring value into his life, he would need to work hard to win the girl over. And he did, eventually. These days, they enjoy cooking at home and cherishing each others' company. When a man knows his woman's worth, he would never throw her away. You wouldn't want to lose a diamond.

I'm telling you ladies, pretty much all single straight men want to sleep with you, if they get given the opportunity, they probably will. You need to remember that if somebody doesn't work hard for your affection, they will never know your value. You cannot sell yourself short of anything less than the price of a diamond. I know it makes me sound like an outright fussy bitch but you will thank me one day for telling you this. If your aim is a one night stand, be my guest and close this page. If you want a relationship that is meaningful where your man knows how much you mean to him, you must first eliminate all the men who are not willing to put themselves out there for you. You do this by rejecting any forms of physical intimate contact until they factor you as an important part of their lives and have earned your trust. If they are a good guy, they will still stick around to understand the real you. Reliability, honesty, integrity and respect all come into play at this point. At first, you may feel like you will never find someone who can meet up to your standards, but eventually, the right man will come along and pay for the diamond because he is convinced it will be worth it.  

Don't ever settle for anything less.





My love forever and always,

Krystina

Be a woman of class

 

The feeling of unwarranted loneliness during the past few weeks had taken a toll on my mentality. I wanted to be understood and cared for. I was sick of making decisions, of domestic routine, of waking up to the sound of my alarm clock. I wanted to go home and cuddle with my little brother, have long meaningful discussions with my Dad and fall asleep in my Mum's arms. It was hard especially during Chinese New Year because I knew for the first time in many years, I would be alone on a day I would normally spend with my loved ones.

I didn't recognize myself anymore. I had changed from someone innately independent to a needy little girl. I realized at this time, I was the only person who could make things better.

I want to tell you something that might not cure your loneliness but it will benefit you in so many ways. I wasn't able to think clearly at first but I can now.

Here it is;

Be a woman of class. 

What I mean by class is someone who will never undermine herself no matter how she is feeling. This woman is confident in her decisions and can see the big picture instead of letting small mishaps or periods of loneliness affect her values and goals. She has a life she can be proud of because she knows her own capabilities and she doesn't need anyone to justify how fantastic she is. She can be there for the ones that she cares about because she doesn't crave reassurance from them, she enjoys their company. She doesn't compare herself to anyone else and she doesn't expect everyone to love her. She has that thing I talked about in one of my first posts called the inbuilt happiness. As a woman, you also need inbuilt class. No matter what other people say, what mistakes you have made in the past, you can move on without hatred or contempt. Class is about treating yourself right, treating others with respect and carrying yourself with integrity.

I was not a woman of class during my needy period. Actually I was far far away from where she stands. But I am wide awake now. There is always that point in time where you snap back into place. Before that, no matter what people say to make you feel better, it doesn't have any impact. I love the wake-up period because your mind is completely refreshed. But as you reflect on the past few weeks, you really cringe at the person you were.

All I can say is...

I'm back baby! 

I even treated myself to the Peace Love and Juicy Couture perfume so I smell amazing. Versace and DKNY scents are still my favorite but every now and again when I need a little help to retain my class, I will spray my Juicy Couture.

After a grueling two weeks of utter nonsense, I'm stronger than I ever was. I'm also a little sleepy. I will talk to you guys later.





My love forever and always.

Krystina

Growing up and 'Chanel'

My friend wanted to introduce me to his favorite perfume for women called 'Coco Mademoiselle' by Chanel.

I had never smelt anything like it.

It reminded me of a 1940's black and white movie. Something classy, feminine, complicated, wise and very nostalgic.

I fell deeply in love with the scent and I was very tempted to buy it. To some extent I should have treated myself, I had been frugal for as long as I could remember. However, this time, I chose to walk away.

When I was a little girl, I saw how beautiful my Mother was (and still is) by appearance and by character. As a result, I wanted to grow up as quickly as possible. I would sit on the bed next to my Mother's dressing table and watch her go through her beauty routine. I remember the little case of Chanel face lotion that I could only smell but never touch. I wanted to grow up and discover my own piece of Chanel.

Chanel is more than a scent, it is the epitome of class and of being a woman. 

I can't pull it off right now. I don't have the level of maturity to be someone I would have looked up to as a little girl. I'm still trying to figure out who I am. I have a lot things to do, places to go and goals to accomplish.

Chanel stands for so much more than merely a perfume. It signifies what I ultimately want to be. Someone classy, someone wise, someone who holds herself up with dignity, value and maturity. All of that comes with growing up and experiencing life.

I can only hope that someday, my own children will sit next to my dressing table, see my spray on Chanel and dream about growing up a little faster themselves.

  
I know I will get there.





My love forever and always,

Krystina